Does my cat know I love them?

Cats’ ways of belonging are uniquely nuanced and subtle. One of the best descriptions of their love language was created by Antoine de Saint-Exupery in his timeless “The Little Prince”. In the book, the main character converses with a fox who becomes his guide into a sophisticated craft of bond-making of a wild animal (and no matter how much time your cat spends on the couch he or she is still a wild animal at heart!).

“I can’t play with you,” the fox said. “I’m not tamed” [...]

“What does tamed mean?” said the little prince. 

“It’s something that’s been too often neglected. It means, ‘to create ties’. [...] 

“What do I have to do?” asked the little prince. 

“You have to be very patient,” the fox answered. “First you’ll sit down a little ways away from me, over there in the grass. I’ll watch you out of the corner of my eye, and you won’t say anything. Language is the source of misunderstandings. But day by day, you’ll be able to sit a little closer. [...] It would have been better to return at the same time. For instance, if you come at four in the afternoon, I’ll begin to be happy by three. [...] if you come at any old time, I’ll never know when I should prepare my heart… There must be rites. [...] If you tame me, my life will be filled with sunshine. I’ll know the sound of your footsteps that will be different from all the rest. [...] You see the wheat fields over there? I don’t eat bread. Wheat fields say nothing to me. But you have hair the color of gold. So it will be wonderful, once you’ve tamed me! The wheat, which is golden, will remind me of you. And I’ll love the sound of the wind in the wheat…”

Just like the fox from Antoine de Saint-Exupery’s novel, your cat reads rituals, intentional attention and gestures as care and as “love”. The relationship with a cat is more about life-long bonding than words or strong emotions. It’s like dishes from traditional French cuisine - cooked slowly with simple ingredients that together create a layered symphony of flavours. 

Is feeding your furry royalty and cleaning their litter box enough to make them feel important? That’s the bare minimum. To fully unlock the potential of showing your pet that they are loved, be sure to include playtime routine, grooming time (if they appreciate touch) and some down time together when you stay emotionally and energetically open for them to come to you. Listening together to classical music is also a powerful, underappreciated way to bond. You’re welcome to try one of the Chic Cat Lady playlists from here. Last but not least - slow blinking is a perfect way to speak directly in non-verbal terms. Closing your eyes slowly and gently opening them means “I care” in cat’s dialect. 

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